Once
again this is a sad but increasingly common story. It's a case of not
only abuses but wrongly framed and absolutized doctrines and ethics
that are unable to function in light of the dynamics of Scripture and
in the real world. The end result is frustration and overreaction.
Well do I remember when the Patriarchy movement was in full swing in the 1990s and early 2000's. It's really sad to see what kind of fruit it is producing. Even what is often reckoned 'good fruit' is not. Generation Joshua as Patrick Henry College/HSLDA bloc called it is turning out to be a disappointment and in not a few cases a catalyst for apostasy. One might include 'justified mockery' in the case of someone like Madison Cawthorn, except his conduct and antics are not even slightly funny but are indicative of someone deeply disturbed and in spiritual trouble.
It's additionally sad because aspects of the movement are to be appreciated though I was always alienated from it due to its Dominionist proclivities and postmillennial assumptions - even though many caught up in the movement do not understand these forces that shape it.
The numerous frauds and false teachers in these ranks will have to answer for these apostasies - as they helped sow these seeds.
I was also thinking about this the other day while listening to a Reformed pastor speaking about the loss of children to 'woke ideology and social justice'. He cast it in terms of these kids being seduced away from the faith by these ideologies.
I have never been concerned even for a moment that any of my kids would be taken in by this stuff and led away from the faith. Why? Because in addition to being grounded in Scripture they were taught the ugly truth of the world and its nations and the place of the Church (and the False Church) within it. Too many conservative Christians (so called) have adopted narratives and myths about history, politics, and the like and they believe in their own propaganda you might say. Their kids go out into the world charged with this stuff and then discover it doesn't stand up to scrutiny, let alone historical or philosophical evaluation. This generates a crisis of faith - as their faith is inseparable from these historical narratives and myths. The foundations crack and it all starts coming down.
My children were not taught these myths but instead were taught about the history in analytical terms - the good, the bad, and the ugly. And to be honest, there's very little that can qualify as good. We also discussed the lost people of the world and the limitations of their vision and how they will inevitably react to not just Biblical Christianity but also the counterfeit versions represented within the ideological sphere of Christendom so-called. My children as such are prepared to answer not just the kind of material they would be presented with at a place like Wheaton or Liberty but also what they would encounter at a secular university - neither of which is going to teach the truth. Not everything the secular academics say is wrong but it's often framed wrong. In some quarters there's good analysis but wretched conclusions. In other cases, their entire framework of thought, ethics, and analysis is flawed. I'm sorry to say but that's also true in not a few cases when it comes to the Christian and especially Evangelical sphere. Lies are lies even if one set of them happens to tickle Christian ears.
I have on numerous occasions said to my wife that either our children will catch the fire (so to speak) and embrace the vision and as a consequence embark on a frustrating and often lonely course in life vis-à-vis the institutional Church - or they'll eventually decide we're crazy and walk away from it all.
So far so good - God be praised. They are persevering and (I think) they are beginning to appreciate their parents more and more as the years go by. Maybe that will change in time. I don't expect them to merely parrot my views - nor would I really want them to. They're all wrestling with their own dilemmas out in the world. I wouldn't have it any other way.
Extreme faith has its dangers - it's either vital or it withers and dies and results in apostasy. While watered down Evangelicalism might seem more moderate and thus stable, the truth is it's merely shallow and will not stand. Time has shown that it's primary method of survival is endless compromise to the point that there's almost no substance left.
In every case, these apostates seem filled with bitterness and it drives them toward a categorical rejection of their parent's belief system.
It's also troubling that liberal Evangelical outlets like the Roys Report are eager to give voice to these people - presumably motivated by sympathy. By 'liberal' here I do not refer to the political left but to an increasing theological liberalism which in some cases leads to a more left-progressive political orientation. But these do not always go hand in hand.
I certainly know of theologically liberal Trumpites, as well as theologically liberal Leftists. And increasingly I find there are many who consider themselves theologically conservative but barely qualify as such. And there are many who call themselves politically conservative but are not really all that conservative at all. They are nationalists and capitalists but little else.
In most cases the liberal theology is rooted in questions of ethics and feminist responses to perceived patriarchal misogyny. These immodest women want to show skin and not feel guilty about sexual exploration (in other words experimenting with fornication). The justify their promiscuity by accusing their critics of slut-shaming and the like - attempting to flip morality on its head.
In keeping with the modern Evangelical ethos they condemn all manner of guilt and doubt and any teaching or teacher who generates these feelings is tagged as a manipulator or abuser. This rejection of conscience and the struggle basic to Christianity (Romans 7, Philippians 2, 2 Peter 1) can be the result of bad or unbalanced teaching or simply a rejection of core components of the gospel they find psychologically upsetting. The all but lost teaching of mortification comes to mind. The Evangelical ear and its concept of grace will even at times respond to Biblical teachings concerning repentance, holiness, mortification, and warning as if they're a works-gospel heresy and will often chafe at the Biblical demands for sanctification and perseverance - instead seeking a shallow comfort in the cheap grace/easy believism of the Evangelical mainstream.
In other words a call to a vital and vigorous Christianity is condemned as a works-based gospel and viewed as both heretical and abusive. Misguided and manipulated appeals to grace and often an ad hoc over-realized eschatology are used to justify egalitarianism and even antinomianism. And needless to say these people have drunk deeply from the psychology-polluted wells of highly individualised self-fulfillment - failing to understand just how unbiblical these notions are.
This is not to say that some Right-wing Christian groups aren't also swimming in these waters when it comes to their ideas of patriarchy, manhood and masculinity - often combined in an erroneous and ad hoc fashion with Dominionism and the Magisterial Protestant doctrine of Vocation. A Dominionist theology that suggests men get to find fulfillment in reaching for the stars while women are of lesser value or importance is erroneous. But so is the notion that domesticity is of lesser value. As a husband and wife we are a unit, the core of a family. Everyone plays their part and no one is more important or better than someone else. But the roles are different. If the roles are mixed up, things go wrong. If the husband and wife are not united, then cracks and eventually chasms appear. How do you keep united? Put the other person first as much as that is humanly possible. But if you love them, it's not that hard. We willingly sacrifice things for each other and with joy.
Of course what we now see is Dominionism and Vocation being used to justify both men and women 'reaching for the stars' so to speak. These teachings are used to cancel out other Biblical teachings concerning marriage and the family as well as 'gender roles'.
The truth is as Christians we don't find our value, identity, or purpose in our careers or in our status vis-à-vis the world. Such thinking is sure to frustrate and generate strife and unhappiness. We are called to bear the cross and live as pilgrims - we don't reach for the stars. We are called to humility patterned after Christ's earthly ministry. It's not our calling to be rulers of the Earth or to seek wealth or status. It may very well be that these churches would simply empty out if the people understood this. It's not an attractive message nor one that pleases the flesh. I am a Christian first, then a husband and father. My job is not primary or even secondary. And it's a job. My vocation is to be in Christ - a Christian. This is why poverty is often better than riches and (in defiance of worldly definitions of success and middle-class values) I don't care if my sons dig ditches for a living. All that matters is that they're Christians. To be honest I would rather seem them dig ditches and clean toilets than be doctors or lawyers, or work for some Fortune 500 company.
But everyone's life is different and we cannot foresee the roles and tasks God has for us.
In some cases (when it comes to these conservative groups) legalism does play a part which always wreaks havoc on the conscience and the New Testament concept of assurance - which is a dynamic, a blessed hope, and actually quite at odds with typical Evangelical understandings which tend toward a kind of presumption unknown to the New Testament. And so it is often the case that both sides bear some of the blame. And I don't doubt that some of these groups (without meaning to)generate confusion, frustration and even a kind of spiritual schizophrenia.
The heart of the Christian life is self-denial and the flesh chafes against this. In every one of these instances of apostasy their break with Christianity is born out of some kind of self-affirmation - indeed a rebellion against God, the sign of a fall from grace.
The other danger in some of these circles is that self-abnegation is confused with subjugation to a demagogue (or oligarchy) often coupled with legalist ethics. That is a distortion of the gospel and will lead to broken lives, despair, bitterness, and in some cases apostasy.
In this case, the burden laid on this woman (as a daughter) smacks of the extreme. I would certainly be accused of having patriarchal tendencies in some quarters and yet the approach outlined in the article is not one we have pursued. Our unmarried but still at home daughters drive and work and are out in the world - but with some careful forethought and discernment. They are not encouraged to go to college but I wouldn't forbid them or hinder them either. The questions are more in the realm of why and to what end - and the question of debt and bondage, as well as the trap of investing in a career and how that is not easily abandoned if and when marriage becomes a possibility. But if marriage is not on the horizon, it is good to experience some life (not as a character on a sitcom like Friends), but as a Christian with eyes open interacting with the world. This work or job doesn't have to be the central portion of one's life but I don't see the absolutized domesticity model (like with the Botkin girls) as the ideal.
Without struggle there is no character development. Without adversity, faith cannot be tested and strengthened. It is folly to throw young children into the matrix of the world, but young adults? That's something quite different. Because our daughters respect us and know that we care about them, they value our opinion and we talk about what they do and don't do. Though this upsets some Christian mindsets, there is no checklist or flow-chart you can follow. Each situation is different and requires wisdom. Can a Christian daughter work at a local store? Most likely yes - but maybe not. It just depends on a lot of variables.
I have a daughter that cleans houses. She doesn't advertise because there's a lot of situations she doesn't want to get involved with. Instead she acquires new customers by word of mouth and by referral. Those people that we think have good judgment are encouraged to give out her name and that sort of thing. There are some dubious situations that arise where she (diplomatically) says no thank you. She drives to these jobs, earns her money, saves, and has to wrestle with how to deal with people and solve problems. It's been good for her - and it's humbling to scrub other people's toilets and the like.
Another daughter works at a grocery store. Her supervisor is a man. This could be a bad thing to be sure. In this case it's some 30-something 'dude with a man-bun' as we refer to him. He's not a Christian, but he's alright (if you follow). He's married and seems to be professional. There have been no red flags. I know some would raise their eyebrows at this but I know my daughter and the overall situation. It's fine - for the present. This isn't a career. It's work. It's about saving some money - maybe for a car. It's about life experience and learning to interact with the world. It's ugly out there and so if they can find a situation that isn't so bad - be thankful.
Do my daughters encounter (at Bible studies for instance) young Evangelical women who are pursuing the career path? Yes they do, and these encounters generate questions and sometimes there's even some jealousy with regard to all the 'things' these women are doing - but on the other hand my daughters (and sons) can see the traps these people are falling into and the worldliness that seems to dominate their thinking.
I am not a Baptist. I believe that due to the covenant promise of God made to households we baptize our children and make them members of the covenant. They are as a result Christians, part of the Church and raised as such. I'm not looking for a conversion experience but perseverance - a born again life. And yet as I've told them all repeatedly, they must 'own' the faith. Whether they have a 'moment' or a series of progressive moments, however it works out they must embrace the faith fully. They can only do this by understanding what it is in terms of the world. The kind of sheltering this apostate young woman experienced is not only unhelpful it is unwise.
In truth we all go through seasons of stagnation and renewal. We all must repent and believe regularly. The one-time 'event' understanding of the gospel that dominates Evangelicalism ignores much of what the New Testament teaches. It takes one aspect of doctrine and makes it the lens through which all else is viewed and as such it dishonours the larger body of truths and ultimately does great harm.
Some will have heard this story before. I know of an Fundamentalist/Evangelical father who was benevolently domineering and yet also had high expectations for his children in terms of 'success' as the world reckons it. His oldest daughter was (upon homeschool graduation) given a car and mobile phone and sent away to college - this was many years ago now. Within six months she was pregnant and underwent a process of apostasy. He had highly sheltered his children and its clear they (or at least this daughter) were ill-prepared and had a poor grasp of the faith. This is not to say any of this is formulaic but the means provided were not employed and there was singular lack of discernment. His daughter was destroyed as was this father. His response was to go the full Evangelical route and he quickly abandoned all his old standards and convictions - some good and some bad. They profess the faith but looking at his social media page I'm not sure just what faith that is anymore. They are all but indistinguishable from the world. The world has (it would seem) broken them.
The New Testament is filled with largely ignored warnings and admonitions. I believe it was Arthur Pink who said it is no child's play to follow the Lamb whithersoever He goeth. We would do well to meditate on that.
Our children must become adults. Women are called to submission but that doesn't mean they're children. I don't want a wife who is like a child. That old cultural view that many of us remember was skewed. The egalitarianism that has replaced it is perhaps a more grievous error. The previous view often strayed into misogyny (yes, it's real) and distorted the male-female husband-wife dynamic. It (like all things within Christendom) was a kind of cheap knock-off, a counterfeit version that distorted the real thing. Now there's been a reaction to it that is unfortunate and the reactions to these reactions (such as some forms of Patriarchy) don't always get it right either. I see Christians trying so desperately to engage culture but instead are shaped by it and allowing it (in both positive and negative terms) to define their categories.
Beware the kind of absolutizing tendency seen in some quarters. Years ago I remember one family that was highly influenced by these same schools of thought - Vision Forum, Patriarchy and the like. They also were deeply committed to the family-integrated Church model which rejects Sunday school and the like. I am not unsympathetic to this though some have abused it and absolutized the family at the expense of the Church. In other cases I chuckle as some very conservative circles separate men and women in church - not on the basis of modern theories of psychology, education, and market driven thinking but out of very traditionalist views of gender and gender relations. They would reject the family integrated model but on a very different basis! I'm thinking here of groups like the Amish or ethnic Christian communities - or even orthodox Jews.
Anyway, this family (which later would become libertine Evangelicals and I think has since all but apostatized) refused to even attend a church with a Sunday School. They literally made it a Mark of the Church, a question of orthodoxy or the gospel. Needless to say they found nowhere to go as it's rare to find a church that doesn't have some kind of Sunday School. I pointed out that you could have a more didactic portion of worship and if the kids could stay in that part of the meeting (as opposed to be scooted off to another room to color pictures of Jesus), then it was fine. They refused this. Again, there are numerous problems with how Sunday School is done and the way it (as a Church gathering) is separated from worship proper and thus used as a means of exercising endless ecclesiological loopholes, and yet to refuse to attend a church over this? This is folly. If the Sunday School is a problem (and it often is) then just don't go. But don't absolutize these issues and make them essential and non-negotiable, not subject to any kind of mediation or applied wisdom.
Sadly that family ended up staying home, their undisciplined children were basically incapable of sitting through a church service. Church meetings became episodes of frustration and embarrassment - due to their own inept parenting. Things got more and more lax and eventually I don't think they could even hold things together for a session of family worship. Last I knew the skirts and modest clothing were replaced by tank-tops and heavy make-up. And instead of Church, they were going to Jonas Brothers concerts, Comicon, and the like. And their homeschooling degenerated into a joke and those kids (some now adults) are ill-equipped to say the least. Other times I've seen this sort of thing have led to great bitterness and anger on the part of these kids as they realize they are unable to compete or even function effectively in the world. I don't see a happy ending there.
Too often these extreme models put people under great stress and pressure. And they break. I'm not going to examine whether or not their faith was real or not. That's not the question and that's not actually what 1 John 2 is suggesting as the passage deals with these antichrist figures or teachers. These are people whose faith has been broken and they have lost their way. It's a warning and a tragic one.